Economic Models Explained with Cows * (Warning: politically incorrect)
Humor
Socialism:
You have 2 cows and give 1 to your neighbour.
Communism:
You have 2 cows. The State takes both and gives you some milk.
Fascism:
You have 2 cows. The State takes both and sells you the milk.
Nazism:
You have 2 cows. The State takes both and shoots you.
Bureaucratism:
You have 2 cows. The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, then throws the milk away.
Traditional Capitalism:
You have 2 cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.
Surrealism:
You have 2 giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.
An American Corporation:
You have 2 cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of 4 cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has dropped dead.
A French Corporation:
You have 2 cows. You go on strike, organise a riot and block the roads, because you want 3 cows.
A Japanese Corporation:
You have 2 cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
A German Corporation:
You have 2 cows. You re-engineer them so they lived for 100 years, eat once a month and milk themselves.
An Italian Corporation:
You have 2 cows but you don't know where they are. You decide to have lunch.
A Russian Corporation:
You have 2 cows. You count them and learn you have 5 cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 2 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.
A Swiss Corporation:
You have 5000 cows. None of them belongs to you. You charge the owners for storing them.
A Chinese Corporation:
You have 2 cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.
An Indian Corporation:
You have 2 cows. You worship them.
A British Corporation:
You have 2 cows. They're both mad.
An Iraqi Corporation:
Everyone thinks you have lots of cows. You tell them you have none. No-one believes you, so they bomb the sh*t out of you and invade your country. You still have no cows, but at least now you are part of a democracy.
Welsh Corporation:
You have 2 cows. The one on the left looks very attractive.
An Australian Corporation:
You have 2 cows. Business seems pretty good. You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate.
* I don't know the author of this but I think it's so clever.
updated by @gaynor-madoc-leonard: 11/11/15 10:37:45PM
