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Llangollen to Erect Hollywood Style Sign


By Ceri Shaw, 2011-04-01

Llangollen town looks set to honour the Llangollen International Musical Eisteddfods 65th Anniversary by erecting a Hollywood Style Sign in the Beautiful and Iconic Hills over looking the Festival Site.

Last night (31st March) the councils planning applications sub committee gave the go ahead for a 500,000 sign to be built in the breathtaking vista above Llangollen town amongst the Berwyn Mountains. The sign will mark the councils gratitude to thousands of competitors and visitors the Eisteddfod brings to Llangollen each year.

Cllr. Joe King deputy chairperson of Llangollen Towns planning applications secondary sub committee, said: This new landmark for Llangollen is a fitting tribute and celebration of the millions of people who have visited the Llangollen Eisteddfod over the last 65 years. Cllr. King went on to say It is a sign of this countys gratitude to these exceptional people who organize the Eisteddfod year after year and it will stand as an iconic Welsh monument marking how music and culture can bring people from all walks of life and all nations together.

The proposal is promoted by the Llangollen International Musical Eisteddfod, and Mervyn Cousins, Chief Executive of the Eisteddfod was thrilled by the result. Some members of the board were worried that we might have opposition to the sign from some locals, but it just goes to show that yet again, this small town can pull together and make a big difference. Local shopkeeper Faye Kinnit, who helped the campaign for the sign has said I grew up wanting to live in Hollywood, but with all the global superstars who come to Llangollen every year theres never been a need for me to make the move. Its only fitting that the sign has been approved.

This years music festivals has attracted a host of stars including McFly, Russell Watson, Lulu and Julian Lloyd-Webber. There will also be over five thousand singers, dancers and instrumentalists from around 50 countries perform to audiences of more than 100,000 over the 7 days of the event.

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Reprinted with permission from David Western's blog, all material 2011, David Western --

There's only one week left in our 'help design the spoon' contest! So jump up off your backside, grab a pencil, unleash your creative 'inner-self' and sort out an entry or two - one of the easiest art projects you'll ever do. Seriously, the circles we need filling are only 2 inches in diameter each!! If you've been thinking about....its time to stop procrastinating and start scribbling! You could win a book AND the admiration of all and sundry!!!! C,mon...you can do it!!!!

If you have already entered...well done!! If you haven't...keep this one important thought in mind.....once we pick the winners, you'll never be able to say, "pfffft, I could have done waaaay better"....because frankly, you didn't!!!! So get in there, scratch out some lines and be part the fun!!!!


To motivate you, here's my contribution...none of which will appear on the final product even though I'm pretty pleased with the stylized Eagle and will definitely use it somewhere. The Beaver is pretty cool but any half-way competent NW Coast artist would likely only give me a C for effort and probably wouldn't be that impressed by my handling of line and form....and the stylized leek???? Well, it didn't exactly turn out like I hoped. SO, there you go, I've hung myself out there for all to see and now its your turn to enter some really motivated ideas and consign these to the bin.


From Dave's "editor": We'll choose the winning designs next weekend so this is your last chance to submit some Welsh designs, Celtic symbols or Celtic designs and to be part of creating this incredible piece of original Welsh-Canadian art. Winning designs will be part of Dave's creation and will be displayed at the West Coast Eisteddfod Welsh-American Arts festival in Los Angeles. Submit yours and be part of Welsh Arts and Welsh Culture at this year's West Coast Eisteddfod!




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This blog can be found in its original format with pictures at http://craphousewife.blogspot.com/ and www.crapwifeblog.co.uk

Last night didnt turn out quite as Id planned.
Where are my clothes?
Wherever you left them, Husband.
I left them in my house, and theyre not here now.
Maybe they were stolen, Ive been distracted today what with trying not to impale myself on a golfing umbrella and being fat.
I didnt call you fat. He says.
You did a bit. Its fine, and I will diet if itll make you happier.
(Accusing someone of calling you fat is an easy way to panic them. This only works if youre fat.)
I didnt say I want you to diet!
You said that I should be vegetarian in order to lose some weight!
No I didnt! Thats about your headaches! And I didnt even suggest it! It was my mother!
So now your mother thinks Im fat?
The ripe panic on Husbands face is as obvious as that wart thing on Sarah Jessica Parkers chin.
Look, can we just drop it, Husband; youre only making it worse. Ive had a really busy day today and Ive got a paper cut. And stop going on about your clothes, I dont know what youve done, but I suggest you find them.
Yeah ok babe, Ill go and have a look, I need to find something- Ive got my team lunch out tomorrow and theyre doing pictures for the new ID badges.
Shit.
Husband rummaged around upstairs for nearly an hour. Obviously he was never going to find his clothes- by that time they were probably being chucked around by a night-shift postal worker that smells of grapes and speed.
Cant find them babe- but good news... Ive found my old Uni clothes in the attic; Ill throw some of them on a quick wash.
Oh my fucking God.
I dont know if Im alone here, but when Husband and I moved in together, I confiscated a large portion of his wardrobe for shames sake. Theyve been boxed in the attic ever since.
You cant wear those, I forbid it.
Im going to have to babe. If my clothes really have been stolen then I dont have a choice- I cant even pop to Tescos to get something new as Ive had a few beers. Hes calling my bluff. He wouldnt.
Apparently he would. The man has no shame.
Husband went to work this morning dressed in a Global Hyper Colour T-shirt, leather waistcoat and a pair of satin stripe trousers belonging to a long lost tuxedo. The trousers are so tight you can see his knob, the waistcoat has the look of a raped and splayed bean bag and the T-Shirt appears to have Chlamydia. I am absolutely fucking mortified.
You dont have to tell people that youre married when youre on a works day out Husband- I dont mind if you want to pretend that youre single sometimes.
Dont be daft, Wife, I love you, I love telling everybody that Im married to you. I have photos of you in my wallet. I show them to everyone.
I just mean that you dont have to mention my name- you could just say my wife you dont have to use my full name.
Youve got a lovely name, I like it when people know were married, loads of people in work know you.
Ive always considered my Husband to be a really decent accessory- hes a tidy bit of kit. Im proud to be married to him because hes an amazing person but mainly because because hes quite easy on the eye. The thought of him venturing out looking like hes been dressed by an autistic Gok Wan is making me die inside.
Dont forget 1pm in La Cantina- Ive left taxi money on the bookcase- all the Husbands and Wives are going so Ill be really pissed off if youre not there- I did email you about it yesterday.
I dont read his emails, theyre really fucking boring; He once sent me 800 words about the new adjustable desks being introduced at the firms new premises. Since then I just reply Ok, Love you to whatever he sends.
I hope to God I impale myself on a golfing Umbrella before midday. RoadRunner- 1 Wiley Coyote- 0.
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Not a peal of bells


By Byn (Bynbrynman)Tavarn Ty Elise, 2011-03-31
I apologise if it appears as though I'm plumbing the depths but I'm getting desperate,I believe in the expression 'God helps them who help themselves', I don't believe in standing idly by watching everything going to pot, but doing nothing is not negative, it is neutral and cheap, whilst paradoxically, doing something can cost, therefore, as in my case, mainly ink & petrol, expensively negative. More than a year out of work, the money my mother left me has gone up in smoke as has the contemptible contents insurance; I am left with nothing except hundreds of photos that no-one wants. The good news is that on April 9 the pub will be cleaned out ready for work to start on the rebuilding, the bad news is that, if as likely, the bar won't be ready before the end of the year my problems will be almost insurmountable without financial support. I have just bought two new tyres with post-dated cheques, my car insurance runs out tonight, I have electricity & water bills, plus a personal loan to pay back. I need money now! There must be someone out there, benefactor, sponsor; saviour, who can help to keep me afloat; I should have earned enough money at Easter, Whitsun and the Summer, but it looks at present as though that has been put off for another year. Now I've got that off my chest I'm going to try and switch off for an hour or so to see how Sir Percy Blakeney aka The Scarlet Pimpernel escapes from prison, which I suppose he will. Thank goodness for my books & my friends.

If there is anyone who can help me until I get back on my feet; Paypal to my e-mail: bynwalters@libertysurf.fr or cheque to Byn Walters, Tavarn Ty Elise, 29690 Plouye, Bretagne/Brittany

Apologies again if this appears unseemly.

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Dewi and I left Madison yesterday morning and spent the night outside Toledo, Ohio--it was a long day of driving with only a couple of stops. It was sunny and quiter warm--even had the car windows down when I was in town.

Today we drove from Toledo to Akron (usually 3 hours) in about the same 9 hours--we took the scenic route along Lake Erie to begin with, driving under (hand to God, these place names are true) Fangboner Rd., on the way to Put-in-Bay, which is near Port Clinton. You connect the dots and creat your own punchline.

We also went to Lakeside--a quaint littletown that hosts a Chattaqua in the summer, but is like aghost town this time of year--not even a place to get breakfast! Then we went to Marblehead to see the lighthouse, whichwas pretty, but would have been more interesting if it had been open.

Also, it was noticeably colder, greyer and windier today. By time I stopped for lunch at 1 pm, there were even a few stray snowflakes coming doiwn! I wanted to go to a paper warehouse (don't ask) so that took a couplw hours after lunch. By time I finished there, we were having a real blizzard--it snowed 3-4 inches in about 4-5 hours and driving the last hour took me 2 hours and it was near-white-out conditions! This is the part of thge trip where we cross River Styxx Road--now who would name a road that? And put houses there? Did not see the Boatman. He probably thgought Hell was freezing ovder. :) The snow finally let up, but everything is covered-it looks like a Christmas card and the roads are all slushy.

If SJ is reading, we may have photos of Dewi in another Welsh-naamed town--if we can get credit for "Valley City, OH"--it is no more a city (less of one, even) than Valley, Wales. We made a U-turn just for the photo op outside the old train depot. Let me know--photos will probably have to wait til the end of April. We also came across a Muffler-Man-like thing up by the lakeand took a photo--don't think it was an actual Muffler Man, but similar.

Visited a couple of cousins tonight, then founda cozy hotel. More cousins tomorrow and maybe Friday morning, then on to Cleveland for the NAFOW planning meetings.

Stay tuned for any other interesting sightings. And, photos later.

Mona and Dewi

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Seren News - April 2011

Welcome to the all-new Seren News! In this issue we bring you an insight into our latest titles. Find out where your favourite Seren authors will be reading in the next couple of weeks.

Ruth Bidgood Shorlisted for Roland Mathias Prize!

Ruth Bidgood's Time Being has been shortlisted for the Roland Mathias Prize 2011. In a career spanning more than 40 years, Ruth Bidgood, who lives in Powys, has published twelve volumes of poetry. Her descriptions in Time Being are credited as Sharp and memorable, tending to a cool accuracy.

The Award Ceremony for the Roland Mathias Prize 2011 will be held at The Guildhall, Brecon on Friday 8th April 2011.

Latest Titles

The Colour of Grass by Nia Williams

Helens family is falling apart. There are no answers from her husband. She can't communicate with her daughter. So she turns to other relatives: the ones who are dead and gone. Straightaway she finds herself floundering in a new world of friends, secrets, enemies and family history enthusiasts. A story about families, past and present, and lifes unexpected connections.

Paperback 8.99 ISBN: 9781854115393

Poor Mans Parliament by Martin Shipton

Did you vote 'Yes' for the new law making powers in the National Assembly? Read this incisive account of the first 10 years of the Welsh Assembly. Its packed with eye-catching drama those who think that nothing happens at the Assembly will read Poor Mans Parliament and wonder how they could be so wrong.

Paperback 12.99 ISBN: 9781854115164


Sound Archive by Nerys Williams

The strikingly original first collection of poems from Nerys Williams. Using formal strategies similar to modernist painting: abstraction, dislocation, surrealist juxtaposition, the poet conjures a complex music, intriguing narratives, and poems full of atmosphere that query identity, gender, and the dream of art as a vehicle for emotion and meaning. A thoughtful, subtle and fascinating first collection.

Paperback 7.99 ISBN: 9781854115386

Coming Soon

The Dragon and the Crescent by Grahame Davies

In the early twenty-first century, the relationship between the West and Islam has, due to recent political events, become the subject of intense study, curiosity and tension. But to understand contemporary anxieties, we need to trace their historical roots. Grahame Davies' The Dragon and the Crescen t does this for one small European nation, revealing for the first time, the full and surprising story of the Welsh relationship with Islam.

Publication April 2011

Paperback 12.99 ISBN: 9781854115577

Noteworthy by Bruce Cardwell

Music makers are the focus of Bruce Cardwell latest book of black and white reportage and portrait photography. Practitioners of acoustic and vocal music folk, gospel, opera, choral, classical and ethnic in Wales over the last decade of the twenty first century, make a rich and diverse gallery of talent.

Publication April 2011

Hardback 14.99 ISBN: 978185411540

Meet the Author

Monday 28th March, 7.30pm. Martin Shipton, author of Poor Mans Parliament , talks at the London Welsh Centre. Lower Hall, London Welsh Centre.

Friday 1st April, 7 pm. Ruth Bidgood will be reading at Oriel Davies Gallery, Newtown with Jan Fortune-Wood.-Ruth's most recent collection Time Being is shortlisted for the Roland Mathias Prize.

Saturday 2nd April, 12pm. Bruce Cardwell exhibits his new book, Noteworthy: Images of Welsh Music at Moma Wales. Mavis Nicholson will open the exhibition.

Tuesday 5th April, 5.30pm. Nia Williams launches her latest novel The Colour of Grass at George & Delila Caf, 104 Cowley Road, Oxford, OX4 1JE

Wednesday 6th April, 7 pm. The Other Room reading series with Carrie Etter, author of The Tethers , Ken Edwards, Alec Finlay, and, by live stream, Derek Henderson, The Old Abbey Inn, 61 Pencroft Way, Manchester M15 6AY. Free admission.

David Hurn and John Fuller present Writing the Picture :

Thursday 7th April, 7.30pm at the Media Point Room, Chapter Arts Centre, Cardiff and Tuesday 12th April, 7.30pm at The Drill Hall, Chepstow. Entrance to both events is 2.00 (redeemable against the price of the book)

Competition

Seren have five proof copies of Daniels Beetles by Tony Bianchi to give away!

What is the key to happiness? Is it a job at www.happinesstheexperience.com ? Daniels Beetles , out at the end of April 2011 is an absorbing, unnerving novel about memory and forgetting, stories and lies.

Send an email with 'Daniels Beetles' in the subject line to seren [at] serenbooks [dot] com for your chance to win. Closing date 4th April 2011 Terms & Conditions

Follow Seren

If you like Seren News and you think that some of your friends would too, why not forward it on to them? Just ask them to email us so we can include them on the next monthly newsletter, keeping up to date on all events, prizes, new titles and news from Seren.

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this blog can be viewed in its original format at www.crapwifeblog.co.uk and http://craphousewife.blogspot.com/

Yesterday was a strange day, I realised in the shower that Im about 2 cinnamon bagels and an ovarian cyst away from having to wash with a sponge on a stick. This is of course a slight exaggeration, but you get the idea.

Im feeling a bit crap overall, and not Crap in an Ive not done the housework and Ive glued his shoes together kinda way- more just a bit glum. Husband deserted me again this morning and went to work. I did tell him that I may get dizzy from all the loneliness, fall down the stairs, impale myself on a golfing umbrella and die, but he left anyway.
I decide early on that keeping busy is the only way to stave off the boredom, so I set about ironing and planning for World Domination. The ironing was actually easier than the plans for domination, which surpised me as Im shit at doing shirts. I also decide to clean out the understairs cupboard and am amazed to discover how much brown paper and parcel tape is lurking behind the coats- its left over from my attempt at becoming an eBay magnate, which like so many of my projects, never materialised.
Husband rings about midday to check how I am.
Im fine thanks flower pots, Im not dead which is good, because you would probably be charged with murder by neglect if I was.
Going to work isnt classed as neglect though really, is it?
Yes. It is actually. The judge would throw the book at you- leaving your defenceless wife home alone where anything could happen- theres probably a paedophile looking for a little whipper snapper like me at this very moment.
Youre mental. Youre not really what they look for babe- they tend to go for smaller younger people. He says
I cant believe you just said that- so Im old and fat now am I? Im only 28, Im hardly Janice Dickinson and you know Im sensitive about my weight!
You know what I mean, shut up will you? back peddles Husband.
So Im old, fat and you dont want to talk to me, fine, Im so glad you phoned.
Dont start, what do you want for dinner tonight, Ill pick something up.
Im not eating, Im too fat. Im going now
Babe....
The boredom today is as thick as the dust my exercise bike and I am forced to take drastic action to prevent tedium induced insanity (this is a very real problem and I am shocked by the lack of public awareness.) Even the Xbox isn't holding my interest, and I love my Xbox so much that if I had a disk shaped penis I'd bum it.
Thankfully, being ingenious, I hit upon a plan. Unfortunately the plan involves venturing back to the Post Office.
I dont know about you, but for me, the worse part of doing the laundry is putting it away- Im not very good at carry things and walking on stairs without falling. This is why Im so pleased with my solution.
Its amazing how many individual items of clothing a 30 year old man can accumulate over the years. Because theyre usually spread between drawers, wardrobes and washing baskets, you never really get an idea of just how much there is.
It cost 61.85p to post all his clothes back to him, I held the Post Office tutters up for ten minutes before they eventually opened up another window for them. I know this money could have been put to better use- especially considering that keeping the dog in fillet steak isn't cheap. I think you'll agree it's worth it though- he did call me fat after all.
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Swansea University's Innovation Centre


By Rhianne Griffiths, 2011-03-30

DIRECTLY FROM WELSH ASSEMBLY GOVT:

Minister formally announces funding for Swansea Universitys new innovation campus

Deputy First Minister Ieuan Wyn Jones will today visit Swansea to formally announce funding for a new multi-million pound science and innovation campus.
Tuesday 29 March 2011

The Welsh Assembly Government is providing 15 million to Swansea University to deliver the proposed Bay Science and Innovation campus that will be located on Fabian Way across a 69 acre site.

An economic study by the University estimates the project will contribute more than 3 billion to the regional economy over the next 10 years and create thousands of jobs.

Plans on display for the new campus include a research and testing facility operated in partnership with Rolls-Royce; integrated teaching and research facilities for the Universitys Schools of Engineering, Business and Economics, Maths and Computer Science, as well as student residential accommodation.

The major research and development facilities are designed to encourage industry to work side by side with researchers, academia and students.

Neath Port Talbot County Borough Council has approved outline planning consent for the new Bay Science and Innovation Campus on the 22nd February 2011.

Mr Jones said,

This project fits into our vision for the Welsh economy with its focus on innovation and research and development. For Wales to succeed in the modern economy, academia and businesses must work together. Wales must move towards a more knowledge based economy where the right conditions exist for innovation to flourish so we can unlock our full potential.

That is why the Assembly Government is pleased to be providing 15 million to help make this campus become a reality. The Universitys research shows the project has the potential to create thousands of jobs for the region and pump millions into the local economy. Of course our funding will be subject to a business case appraisal and the University demonstrating its ability to fund the ongoing operation of the project. Innovation is key to our future in Wales. It is what can pave the way to success both in our businesses and academia. That is our path to further prosperity as we adapt to stay at the forefront of developments. For that reason, this development will be a significant step forward.

Professor Richard B Davies, Vice Chancellor, Swansea University said,

This is a bold and innovative project. It promises to be a global exemplar of universities and industry working together, creating high technology clusters and hugely enhancing the career opportunities for students. We have a number of multi-national companies as partners, but a project of this massive scale could not have proceeded without the assistance of the Welsh Assembly Government. We thank in particular the Deputy First Minister Ieuan Wyn Jones for his support and encouragement and for allocating funds from his own department budget to make the whole project financially feasible.

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Those of you who read my blogs will know how strongly I feel about recycling, regeneration and sustainability in Swansea and Gower. (Particularly Gower).

This is the type of news we welcome as it promises so much for the future sustainability of the region.

When highly intelligent individuals come to Swansea to study they more often than not fall in love with the beauty of Gower and the Swansea coastline. This is very good news indeed because often they decide to live and work here after their student days are over. In choosing to live and work here they boost the economic climate and the vibrancy of the area!

What should the planners be doing to help to make the region attractive to this group of individuals?

One thing they should be attempting is to bring vision to planning the recreational infrastructure. What currently tends to happen is that we train these high-worth individuals, and sometimes we incubate their businesses only to find that when they reach a point where they are viable and begin to employ workers themselves, they transport their business to The Cardiff Bay area where it is deemed to be trendier.

What is the solution? Please feel free to leave your opinion in the Comments section below.

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Acclaimed Hollywood star Michael Sheen has given his support to the Healing The Wounds charity which helps treat sufferers of PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder).

The actor has agreed to become a patron of the charity.

Its a wonderful gesture, said Healing The Wounds charity secretary Carol Richards.

We met Michael the other day and he was very interested in the work of the charity.

He was delighted to accept our invitation to become one of our patrons and we are sure that he will help us put the charity firmly on the map in Wales.

Sheen is currently working on a production of the Passion Play in his hometown of Port Talbot over Easter.

He is famous the world over for his film roles, which include playing Tony Blair, David Frost and Brian Clough.

Carol Richards added: Michael Sheen is a big box office star and a person who obviously cares very passionately about his home community in Wales. We are all looking forward to working with him in Healing The Wounds.

The Healing The Wounds charity was set up in January 2010 to help provide PTSD treatment for members of the armed forces and veterans. It aims to set up a Welsh base for the treatment of PTSD. It is already arranging treatment courses and building a team of counsellors who can treat PTSD.

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This post can be found in its original format at www.crapwifeblog.co.uk and http://craphousewife.blogspot.com/ with pictures and video.

(I'm really sorry about the delay with today's blog, the site hasn't been letting me upload or track any views etc and I'm fucked if I know how to fix it.)
Mother in law has left and were really sad to see her go. Not just because its been nice having her here, but because were frightened of killing the garden- she has managed in under a week to create a gorgeous garden which we can enjoy for years to come. Were tremendously happy with it. Husband however, is nervous. He knows now its just the two of us again that hes vulnerable. Hes right to be scared. Im going to start off subtly, I will start by reintroducing the night time challenges and build up to something major, which is yet to be confirmed. I have lists and a clipboard and Im going to war.
As Husband was back to work today he went for an early night while I caught up on the soaps. I feel better now Ive had my fix but am once again annoyed by some of the storylines in soap-land. Ronnie Mitchell is getting right on my tits. I still havent got over the fact that I waited all those months to see the conclusion of the Danielle Daughter/Mitchell Mother storyline. Im still angry about it. As usual, the ever considerate producers had included a help line number for those affected by the issues in the show.
"Hi, my name's ######. I've been affected by some of the issues in tonights show- you see, I gave my daughter away when she was a baby because my father made me, I grew up distant, closed off and acerbic, and never had a boyfriend 'cause anyone I tried to have sex with lost their penis to the cold, the only saving grace in my sad little life was my overwhelming love for my sister, who I have suffocated and babied through her cocaine addiction in Ibiza and her failed relationships with a nightclub owner, unfortunately, it would appear that she has slept with the only man who had enough sense to use Anti-Freeze instead of KY when he shagged me, and they now have a baby- that they called Amy, you know, like the one I gave away- in between all this, my sister's husband left her, and I had to save them from an icy pool, fortunately I'm immune to the cold; I'm not really speaking to my sister, but I'm making an effort because my father (who told me my kid was dead) is marrying my aunt, not sure how it's come about, but that's how us Mitchells roll, anyway, to get to my point, it would appear that the cleaner from the local pub who's been following me looking sad for a while (can't blame her, I did recently help you get an abortion) is actually my daughter, who is not in fact dead, oh, hang on, that tramp from the car lot has just mown her over. You can see my problem, I've very much been affected by the issues in tonights show, and I think when your writers are mirroring real life so closely in future, you need to think of the affect this could have on your audience."
In typical Eastenders style, they stretched the storyline to breaking point which eventually snapped onto our screens like the cheap, dried out elastic band that holds your fathers VAT returns together in the attic. What reward did we get for our dedicated following soaps passion? Thats right, we got to watch the whining whisperer from Telford being mown down by a slope headed heathen with a bad wardrobe and one necklace to her name.
Fuck you Eastenders.
And theyre at it again.
How long have we been subjected to the baby switching antics of Mrs Branning? At this rate, Ronnies theft of baby Moon wont be realised until alarm bells start ringing when hes old enough to dress himself in leopard skin nylon and a pleather mac. Sad. Its not that Im not able to empathise with the situation, its more that Im mortified that the writers didn't consider cot death alone to be horrific enough to be a storyline in itself, and they felt the need to sex it up with cot swap.
For those of you not in the UK who have no knowledge of Eastenders or the World of British soaps, I apologise for my rant as it must be pretty fucking boring for you. It does have some relevance on the events of the day though.
I have decided that now Mother in Law has left the building that Im going to make my own Eastenders. I have recorded the dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum tune that indicates the end of the show onto my iphone and wont be speaking to Husband without over acting and punctuating my sentences with it.
Hi babe, you alright- missed you today. He says coming through the door.

Were out of milk. I say clutching the empty bottle to my chest and holding my hand to my grief stricken head dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum
What are you doing.
Nothing
Husband ignores the sound bite and gets changed, he's in a cracking mood as I've promised him a chilled out night on the sofa and a really nice meal as during the gardening marathon home cooked fare was been off the cards along with all his favourites foods as his Mum's a veggie.
Husbands a bit scared of vegetarians. His mother hasnt eaten meat since he was about 8 and the thought of a return to vegetarianism strikes fear into his beef clogged heart.
I think I'll leave him watch a film on his own as I'm shattered from fighting yet another migrane today. My migraines have gathered momentum in the last few months. Mother in Law says that she noticed a huge difference in her own battle against the demon headaches after cutting meat and alcohol from her diet. I decide to bring this up:
Babe, Ive felt so ill for such a long time, Ive decided that something has to be done. I have been thinking about it all day, and Ive concluded that, to see if it helps......(dramatic pause)....... Im going to become a vegetarian. dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum
Do you really think it wou- dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum
Stop doing that, its really fu- dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum
Look, if you think its going to help you then Ill do it with you, I hate to see you ill, dont get me wrong, I wont enjoy it, but if it makes you feel better, Ill help. Says the sweetest man in the World.
Im so happy you understand Husband, I know that you love meat, but I really think this could be good for us for a while, we need to start being more health conscious anyway and if it helps my headaches, thats got to be worth it, hasnt it?
Yeah, ok, starting when? says poor, starving Husband. I can see him visibly shrinking in front of my eyes as the joy leaves his body. I had promised him a steak tonight, and when He phoned from work earlier I told him about the two monster fillets I had found reduced in Morrisons.
Ive made a lentil soup for dinner, so no time like the present. I had some earlier though, so youre eating alone. I fed those steaks to the animals, they loved them. Would you do me the honour of....(down on one knee).... Joining me in a cup of barley squash? dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum
Husband settles down to his lentil soup- nutritionally fantastic but a tad low on taste, I should know, I made it myself- I found a recipe online and omitted anything that looked like it could add flavour.Husband looks heartbroken.
The lentil soup really does look like shite. I'm just glad I had that fillet steak, babyleaf salad and glass of bordeax before he got home.
dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum

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